Hawkeye Republican

TOP TEN ISU JOKES: I am still extremely bitter about losing the game. As a result, I feel a compelling need to mock Iowa State--let alone considering that it is funny enough that we would lose by a fluke to such an irredeemable team.

Drum roll please. Let the funny begin.

10. What do you call an intelligent person in Ames, Iowa?
Lost.

9. How is the Iowa State football team like a possum?
They play dead at home and get killed on the road.

8. Where was O.J. headed in the white Bronco?
Ames, Iowa. . . The police would never look there for a Heisman Trophy winner!

7. What's the difference between a porcupine and Jack Trice Stadium?
A porcupine has 40,000 pricks on the OUTSIDE.

6. What's the difference between Dan McCarney and a puppy?
Eventually, the puppy stops whining.

5. Two Iowa State fans are walking in the woods. One says, "Look! A dead
bird!" The other one looks up in the sky and says, "Where?"

4. Why don't Iowa State students use 911 in an emergency?
They can't find "11" on the phone dial.

3. What's the difference between an Iowa State national championship team
and Superman?
Neither of them exist.

2. Why did they quit serving ice water at Iowa State games?
The guy with the recipe died.

1. What do you call a convoy of John Deere tractors going down the road?
The Iowa State homecoming parade.